Sally-Anne’s sense of humour was a defining feature. Despite the nature of this thread, perhaps it’s apt to quote how she described the moderator’s role back in 2009?
Modding for Beginners
1. The Mod must always intervene on a thread at precisely the right moment. For the main protagonist on the thread this will of course be directly after they have had the last word, and preferably the thread will be locked at that point to preserve their last word for posterity. Locking the thread or intervening any earlier would of course be “heavy-handed modding”.
2. The Mod must expect to be besieged by PMs from any members who are losing the argument on a thread. Invariably the PMs will start along the lines of “Sally-Anne, where are you?” The Mod must resist the temptation to say that he or she does not actually live inside the computer, but in a real house inhabited by other real people. As a result, the Mod has something that occasionally resembles a life, which includes the need to eat, sleep and even visit the smallest room without a laptop.
3. Mods must be willing to read every new post on the Forum even when it is of no interest to them or contains the most ineffable drivel. They must then be prepared to read the completely inane posts that will follow the drivel, as night follows day.
4. Mods must never, ever sound bored when answering a post, even when they have read the same post and given the same answer a thousand times before, sometimes within the last week. Smile while you Mod, even if it makes your face ache and your heart sink.
5. A Mod may only ever express their real feelings within the confines of the Dungeon, never on the Forum. Whilst stalking the boards of the Forum a Mod must exude an air of calm, sweetness and light. Frequent cleaning to remove the blood spattered around the Dungeon, caused by the Mods repeatedly hitting their heads against the walls, is included in the job description.
6. Cleaning duties do not end there. Regular daily cleaning of the Forum itself is required to remove quantities of rotten spam. Occasionally a troll will also be sighted, and both the troll and its droppings must be tracked and eliminated. The Mod must be prepared for the fact that the troll is unlikely to go quietly and may send parcels of foul-smelling troll droppings to the Mod via PM before departing for a less well-moderated forum where they can roam free.
7. A Mod must instantly recognise that when a Member posts a picture of her pet snakes, revulsion and mass hysteria will ensue, and the picture must be removed within seconds. When that member later posts a picture of a dog attempting to mount a duck the Mod must realise that it is considered to be the highest form of wit, wholly appropriate to an educational discussion board and the pic must be allowed to stand.
8. Mods should always remember that to do this for absolutely no payment at all is a privilege. They must remind themselves of that especially when mediating in a debate where they are forced to remind squabbling Forum members for the umpteenth time that posting here is not a right but, likewise, a privilege.
9. A Mod must have the wisdom of Solomon, the patience of Job, the endurance of Nelson Mandela and the goodness of Mother Teresa. Even when being trampled on by a herd of angry members, the Mod must have the sticking power of a piece of chewing gum on a pavement.
10. Anyone looking for a job?
Few manage to be both incisive and insightful. By doing all of that and more, seemingly effortlessly, Sally-Anne earned respect. She was a great woman.
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