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PostPosted: Fri Jun 15, 2018 5:15 pm 

Joined: Mon Oct 21, 2013 7:59 pm
Posts: 6630
Let your child find his own way.

I don't mean literally (although I would advise popping them on the bus, rather than driving them door to door)...you cannot choose their friends for them - they have to make them themselves, good or bad - it is not like primary (where parents vet other parents before inviting a child home), you will have very little to do with the school comparatively, so trust him to make good choices.

As a parent be interested, but not pushy. Observe the homework he has on the Show my homework system but let him work out when to do it - or not - and accept the consequences. Ditto with organising his school bag - both my boys had my help for the first week - then they were on their own. If they forgot a book, they didn't do it again. Ditto sports kit etc.

And be prepared for them to be very tired at the end of the first day/week. And also to cry and tell you they hate it. It is very different to primary and, as someone up thread said, going from being one of the brightest in their primary to (for some children) actually the lowest of a VERY bright bunch, can be very difficult. Most children settle by the first half term - if they haven't, then is the time to speak to the school and see if there is anything they can do to help. Some children will struggle in all or some of the classes - rarely is there a child who doesn't find at least one subject more challenging.

But most of all, do NOT tell your child that they are "better" than any of their friends who are not going to Grammar School. They most certainly are not! But do tell them they are "lucky" to be going to one...remember, there is often just one mark - or even just a different distance - between someone who got a place and one that did not, so do not let them feel superior for being there, or they will find it tough to make friends.

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